Tuesday, April 7, 2009

Making Progress


The cabinet doors are sanded and primed. Ready to put the paint on now.


The bases are sanded. Ready to be primed. The mess from sanding the bases...WOW...the whole time I was cleaning it up, I kept thinking to myself "why, oh why did I think it was a good idea to remodel??"


The fabric I picked out to make window treatments with. (thank you Mrs. Gayle for directing me to this website, it matches my plate perfectly!)


This hardware is similar to what I have picked out (of course there is not a picture of what I chose) The biggest difference is that the rod and all accent pieces are black, instead of brown.


This chandelier is very similar to the one I picked out.


Here are some pictures of the glazing technique that we are going to do on the cabinet doors.


I have decided to do the glazing because I like the old world/antiqued look it gives to the cabinets. It really takes the harshness off of bright white cabinets (and hides dirt a little better)
I really appreciate every ones wonderful ideas for the remodel. I was really entertaining the idea of black cabinets, but I have all white appliances and we decided that it just would not look right in our kitchen.

The progress in the kitchen is coming right along and we hope to be finished with the painting before this weekend. I do not want to spend the remainder of the time Jason has off doing home remodeling projects. I really want him to enjoy his time and enjoy family time.
Jason and I were talking with a sweet friend the other day and she asked a question, she asked "How are you guys doing?" Now we have been asked this question so many times, but for some reason when she asked that question it made me stop and think...really how are we (as a family) doing. I came to the conclusion, that like the kitchen, we are making progress. I can see the progress being made, but there are still some rough spots. Granted it has only been 3 weeks that Jason has been home and I know that it is going to take time. The first 2 weeks I have referred to as the honeymoon phase. The kids were on their best behavior. I do not think we had one single behavior problem...not even trouble with sharing. They treated Jason like he was a mega star and would not let him out of their site. Jason had to do everything for them...feed them, clothe them, bathe them...everything. Not only did the kids want Jason to meet all their basic needs, they also wanted him to do all the fun stuff. This is the part I struggled with...some of you may be thinking why in the world...I know, I know...I still think why in the world would I struggle with that. The entire 13 months that Jason was gone, all I could think about was how I could not wait for him to get home so I could have someone to share in the responsibility with me. Then Jason comes home and steps right in like he never left. (I am so thankful that he was able to step right in with out any adjustment issues) But the kids only wanted Jason. I felt like I was loosing my identity. For 13 months I was the only one...the only one feeding them, dressing them, bathing them, taking Jack to school, the only one doing craft time, playing outside and building forts. It was just me. And though I may have complained about it and longed for Jason to get home to share it with me, it was my role. And in those first 2 weeks I was lost...I had nothing to do, no one to take care of, no role (or so I felt) It is weird how for 13 months all I could think about was what a joy it would be when I had someone to share all the responsibility with again, BUT when it happens I struggle. Then the honeymoon phase was over...and last week was a really rough week on the kids. Jack struggled last week with fear that his daddy was leaving again and really acted out with those fears. He would not have anything to do with Jason, not even play with him. Jack and Madeline wanted me to do everything for them and would not let me out of their site for anything. Both kids started struggling with going to sleep (which has not ever been a problem at our house) So I asked Jack what was going on and he said to me "mommy I am scared that daddy is leaving us again" Jason and I did the only thing that we knew to do at that moment. We stopped everything we were doing and we just held Jack. We comforted him and reassured him that Jason was home. I know all to well what it is like to struggle with fear and it hurt me that my child was struggling with the fear that his daddy was leaving again. This is all still new to me, to us, and we are trusting our gut on how to handle each thing that comes up. We are trusting in prayer too and are hopeful that this to shall pass. If we know that the journey set before us is long and steep then how do we get through it without the hope that is only found in Christ.
I know how very important family is. I know how very important each role we play as mom and dad/ husband and wife is , but it took a 2nd deployment to war to make me/force me to truly realize it. It has taken a war for me to realize how important these roles are and how easily I can take them for granted.

Well, I need to get back to the mess in my kitchen...I hope to soon have pictures up of our completed project =)

Jessica

6 comments:

Aimee said...

Your kitchen is going to be beautiful!!! Can't wait to come and see it...


I can't imagine what you are going through, but I do understand the attachment issues your children are going through. You did what is best..just stop everything you are doing and comfort them. Its hard to do that sometime..we are so task minded!!!

Crystal said...

I'm ecited to see the progress on the kitchen! I love everything you've picked out! It's going to look great!

I'll be praying that you all continue to get adjusted as a family again, especially for the kids and their fear that their daddy may leave again!

Misty said...

Remodeling is such a mess, but the result is worth it! You have great taste and I know it is going to look great!

I can't imagine what any of you are feeling right now. I'll pray for all of you as you continue to adjust to this new normal in your lives!

KristinRanae said...

I have that same chandelier (did you get it at the Lighting Showroom) in my dining room! You can probably see it in my MySpace pictures. Also, I have glazed cabinets too:) Mine aren't white but more of a honey color. But, I LOVE the glaze treatment!! I think you will too;)

Nancy said...

I know it will turn out just beautiful, Jessica!
Praying for your family & that the kids will be able to rest well.

The Terrells said...

i love everything you have picked out- can't wait to see the final pics! I am praying for you I can't even imagine what y'all are going through and I think you are probably doing everything you can it is much like us and the truths of Christ we just need constant reminders of what is true- so that is probably what Jack needs - just constant reminders of the truth- that y'all love him more than anything and Jason is not leaving!! I am praying for patience too- love you friend